A bill and dinner.

I posted earlier this morning, but I wanted to unload a little. 

First of all, Thank you from the bottom of my heart to all of the people who are still praying for Kev, the boys and I. We are still needing your prayers so much.  Everytime we turn around there is just another little reminder of our loss.

Wednesday was a bittersweet day for me for two reasons;

The Bitter:
We got the hospital bill for Ireland’s delivery.  Wow was that hard, for some reason seeing the cost of her delivery and the fact that we have no baby to hold just rubbed salt in the wound.  A really big bill, for a really small girl.  I will gladly pay the cost, because let’s face it, this is the only money that we will spend on our Ireland, and that really hurts. 

The Sweet: 
 I have been praying for my friend C since 2004. She has comme to church with me a few times, and I was never sure how she felt about it, I wasn’t brave enough to have the “talk” with her, looking back I am ashamed of that.  I am not bold in my faith, I stumble alot when talking to people about Jesus, and I always leave feeling like I have made a mockery of Christ.  But even when I couldn’t talk to her about Jesus I prayed for C, ALOT.

I had a dinner date with a C on Wednesday night, We have been friends since our freshman year of college. We went to high school together, but didn’t really get to know each other until after graduation. This girl is tough, let me tell you, she put herself through school while raising a baby, working full time and managed to get good grades. I admire her tenacity, because I honestly couldn’t do what she had to do.

 C and I have had a hard eighteen-months, She and I had a falling out and spent a few months not speaking, mostly because of my pride and unwillingness to budge…(like I said, I am a work in progress) We have since made up, but it’s been hard to repair the damage to our relationship. Honestly I didn’t try very hard.

So, I was unsure of how the dinner was going to go, We haven’t had a face-to-face since before I found out I was pregnant with little miss Ireland.  I prayed before I went to dinner, that we could have healing for our friendship, and that we could move forward.

It turned out to be the most amazing two-hours, I have had in a long time.  We talked about Ireland, and how hard this road has been, we cried and laughed and just spent some good time together.  C told me she had been reading Ireland’s blog and she started to cry…she told me that she has been searching for “something” and decided to go to a local church and get plugged in.  She wants a relationship with Jesus, and I am so thankful for that.

 I left our dinner, filled with joy, Our little Ireland’s life is touching people.  I am so glad that I can be bold in my faith through this experience, even though this boldness has come at a great cost.  If having to lose my sweet girl meant that C will spend eternity with her creator, then I know that this heartache will be worth it.

Thank you Jesus for an wonderful ending to a hard day.  In your arms is a great place to be!

C, when you read this…know that I am praying for you. I am praying for you and  your new relationship with Christ, it’s not always easy to trust him, but it is so worth it.  His love is perfect. His plan for you is greater than anything you can imagine.  Trust him, always. Because even in the hard stuff, he is present holding us up when we are too weak to stand.
I love you C.


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  1. ((((Jessica)))) I'm so thankful you had a great dinner with C and that she wants a relationship with Jesus. You will probably not ever know (until you get to heaven) how your trusting in the Lord and living for Him during this sad time with losing Ireland is making an impact for His kingdom. Sometimes words are not necessary to spread the good news of Jesus but living for Him does so much more.

    hugs to you, I'm amazed at your faith and your trust, continually praying for you all


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